From triodee–(at)–nterserv.com Wed Apr 23 17:21:23 CDT 1997
Article: 29278 of rec.audio.tubes
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From: triodee–(at)–nterserv.com (Ned Carlson)
Newsgroups: rec.audio.tubes
Subject: Tube Chickens crossing the road
Date: Wed, 23 Apr 1997 20:02:22 GMT
Organization: Triode Electronics
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How various tube chickens cross the road
Audio Research chicken: Crosses the road if you send it in for a
factory upgrade first.
VTL chicken: Crosses the road only if you can collect on the lifetime
warranty.
Dynaco chicken: Almost always crosses the road, even with some
broken bones, it’ll usually limp across anyway.Often looked down
on, even by chickens that can’t cross the road.
Ongaku chicken:Crosses the road only if you pay it $60,000 first.
Stereophile chicken:Clucks a lot of incoherent babble while
crossing the road.
Single Ended chicken:Crosses only very efficient roads.
Marantz chicken:Crosses the road very carefully to avoid getting
scratched.
Homebrew chicken:Sometimes has beak on its tail and wings
where it’s feet should be, but usually manages to get
across anyway.
Jadis chicken: Needs a new set of a dozen 6550’s almost every
time it crosses the road.
845 chicken: If you touch it while it’s crossing the road, you might
get a 1000 volt shock.
Tube relabeller chicken: Puts new feathers on your chicken, then
charges your chicken five times the going rate to cross the road.
Sometimes seen doing things like putting green feathers
on a Rhode Island Red.
Ned, Triode Electronics, Chicago
From triodee–(at)–nterserv.com Wed Apr 23 22:51:10 CDT 1997
Article: 29288 of rec.audio.tubes
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From: triodee–(at)–nterserv.com (Ned Carlson)
Newsgroups: rec.audio.tubes
Subject: Re: Tube Chickens crossing the road
Date: Wed, 23 Apr 1997 23:26:05 GMT
Organization: Triode Electronics
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OTL chicken: Gets so hot it melts the road tar while crossnig.
AtmaSphere chicken:The feathers cost 2 cents each,
but the chicken costs $10,000
Heathkit chicken:If it won’t cross the road, re-read the
instruction book.
Really old WE chicken: A forklift has to pick it up
and carry it across the road.
British chicken:While croosing the road, slows down every
so often to walk around in circles with other chickens.
Often makes detours for a”pint” while crossing.
Appears to find it amusing to confuse American chickens.
Aussie chicken:Crosses the road, but complains loudly about
“pommie” and “septic” chickens while doing so.
Wants other chickens to see road from it’s point of view:
upside down. Accuses Kiwi bird of fraternizing with sheep.
Kiwi bird: American chickens often mistake it for a
British chicken.
Ned, Triode Electronics, Chicago
From Kevi–(at)–PSCALEaudio.com Thu Apr 24 12:20:03 CDT 1997
Article: 29321 of rec.audio.tubes
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From: Kevi–(at)–PSCALEaudio.com (Kevin Deal /UPSCALEaudio/)
Newsgroups: rec.audio.tubes
Subject: Re: Tube Chickens crossing the road
Date: 24 Apr 1997 08:03:01 -0700
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In article <5jk67u$4p--(at)--al.interserv.com>,
triodee–(at)–nterserv.com (Ned Carlson) wrote:
>
>How various tube chickens cross the road
Magazine Reviewer Chicken – Crosses road. States all older roads crossed were
inferior and dirty, and can’t believe he ever crossed them.
Neurotic Chicken – Before crossing road, dampens it with Sound Coat, lines it
with Shakti Stones and VPI bricks, wears tennis shoes with Sorbothane soles.
Places amp clamp on his beak. Reads numerous maps and travel books. Crosses
road. Changes roads in two weeks.
Newbie Chicken attemtping to impress other chickens. States that while
crossing road…listens to “everything from rock to classical”. In reality
listens to Paula Abdul, Basia, and Janet Jackson.
Best Regards,
Kevin Deal High End, Home Theater,
UPSCALE Audio and Rare Vintage Tubes
1410 Lemonwood Dr West Voice (909) 931-9686
Upland, CA 91786 Fax(909) 985-6968
